Three things to find out if you are suited for a woman’s needs.

Having been together with extroverted and introverted guys, I know what a woman wants in a man. Not to sound cocky (that is the worst trait in a man in my eyes), but I have come up with some ideal things that women find attractive in men.

You don’t have to overcomplicate things — it can be simple. So let us take a look at the three things women really want in men.

Confidence

Research shows that women are less self-assured than men. A confident man to have by your side is something uplifting and reassuring.

As an extrovert woman, I don’t suffer form shyness or anything like that really, but I still love a man who can talk with confidence and buy me a drink and not hesitate to do so.

When dating an introvert, I had to be the one who ordered the food and sometimes pay the bill.

At the time, I didn’t mind — also because there was a language barrier — , but still I craved a man who was able to speak up.

When then dating an extrovert, I realised I liked their confidence and that it could light up a whole room. We were once at a restaurant and he politely asked me what I wanted to eat and then ordered it for me.

For some girls, this would be annoying (I get it), but I quite liked it in that moment and felt like he was in control.

However, it must be said that too much confidence can cause cockiness and women get turned off by that (even eventually when they realise you aren’t the best match for her!).

Find it hard? Find balance. Here are three ways to show someone you like them without being desperate:

…But not too much

My first boyfriend was cocky. There is a big difference between being confident, owning your shit, and being cocky.

I was firstly attracted to him because of his confidence and the way he would walk with his hand in the my back jeans pocket. At the time, I was only 16 and he was way older than me.

This action he did made me believe he was proud to be with me. However, I falsely read into him and he ended up being a dick (excuse my language).

Years later, we met up again.

I am not sure why, but I thought after 8 years he may have changed and our spark was magical nonetheless. It is true that we have something special and always will, but his confidence radar was a bit too much.

Don’t be the guy that thinks he is too good to handle and thinks that all the girls are flauntering after him. Be the guy who is kind and confident with a hint of lust.

The next thing women really want in men is the:

Ability to make decisions

When being with an introvert, I had to make the decisions.

Not to say that all introverts can’t make decisions because I am the worst (lol!). However, when you are with a girl, you want to have some sort of confidence that enables you to make decisions.

I think it is a turn off when guys can’t make the decision and leave it up to the girl to decide everything.

Of course, this should be shared and decision-making is for both to participate in, but when you are dating it is different.

You want the guy to make the first move, decide what is going to happen next and where you are going to go. You want the guy to have some form of control to the point that it turns you on.

When my ex couldn’t make decisions, I would get annoyed.

The last thing you want to make a girl is annoyed.

It will show her you don’t have control over your life and that your ambitions fail.

I remember one German guy I dated who had a company and was a lawyer made decisions before even asking me. But it was in a good way — it kept our relationship surprising and engaging.

The last thing women really want in men is for you to have your:

Own opinion

It is great if you take others opinions into account and I praise you for it!

However, when you don’t have an opinion over a topic, a girl is going to automatically be turned off.

You don’t want to turn off a girl just because you rely on her opinion.

This means to own your voice in other words.

Own what you say and believe in it. It all comes back to confidence, baby.

When you have confidence, you own your voice over certain things and can demonstrate a higher level of understanding and engagement.

Your conversations flow better and you are respected much more by the girl.

I remember one guy I dated just asked my opinion on everything because he didn’t have his own and it annoyed the heck out of me. I wondered what there was to him more than his looks… no affence.